I'm Back...

Okay, so here goes: I’m diving into this blogging world again. I’ve been thinking about doing it for months, stalking the blogs of successful strangers and friends, kicking myself for missed opportunities in the years since I first blogged (who knew people would be making a living off of this?), mulling, dreaming, wondering, and when it comes down to it—procrastinating.

But a new blog by a coworker and his post on perfectionism has kicked me in the pants. Also, a comment by one of his readers, Bethany: “Perfectionism is that voice in your head that says, ‘If you try it, you could fail, and that’s worse than if you never do it at all.’ Which is totally untrue.”

Thank you, brilliant coworker and friends. Thank you, Bethany. That puts words to the voice that has silenced many of my dreams throughout the years. It’s why my first acoustic guitar sat in the corner of my bedroom for a year before I ever picked it up and taught myself some chords. It’s why I’ve had a budget line item labeled “camera” for two years, with plenty of money saved, but still haven’t bought that thing. It’s why I’ve psyched myself out from walking up to many a stranger, introducing myself, and saying hi.

And so, here with little pomp and circumstance (like the new blog design and header I’ve been pondering… and maybe a new title? A different host? And what about ads? And the fabulous photos taken with that nice new camera?), I begin again.

My mom pointed out the other day that for most of my life, I’ve come by things easily. I liked school and being a natural rule-follower, I did well in my studies. Both my earthly father and my heavenly Father have provided for me richly—I’ve never hurt for a home, a car, or a job.

I’ve been given so much, and yet I still fear I will go without; I get cripplingly insecure at the idea of failure. I daily wonder if I’m doing or giving enough. I am indeed, at times, that feverish selfish little clod of ailments and grievances complaining that the world will not devote itself to making me happy.

So here, for all the world to see, is my attempt again at being a force of nature. I hope to use this blog to share my passions and loves with you, my projects and ideas, my discoveries and things that bring me joy. I’m going to go ahead and state for the record that I will mess things up here and be tempted to quit because it’s all not perfect.

And does the interwebs really need another blogger? Probably not. But do I need to be known and have this avenue of expression and accountability to be creative? Yes. And do others (possibly you) need a reminder to be fully who God made you to be and share that with the world? YES.

Let’s go.